6. You Can Change Your Life and Still Take Your Fears With You
You Can Change Your Life and Still Take Your Fears With You
I've made some big, brave changes in my life—but I've often made them while carrying fear and self-doubt with me.
In this episode, I'm talking about the difference between changing your circumstances and changing the way you see yourself, why I believe the inner work matters, and why I've finally decided to put myself—and this podcast—out into the world.
I'm also introducing something I've been quietly building behind the scenes: The Next Chapter Pathway.
In this episode, I'm talking about confidence, visibility, authenticity and something I've learned about making big changes in life.
I've made plenty of big decisions.
I've changed direction, gone back to university in my late forties, home-educated my daughter, moved house and repeatedly stepped into situations that felt uncertain and frightening.
So this isn't a story about someone who used to be too scared to do anything and suddenly became brave.
I've often done the thing anyway.
I've felt the fear and done it anyway.
But what I've learned is that you can change your circumstances without necessarily changing what you believe about yourself.
You can move somewhere new and still take your old insecurities with you.
You can start a business and still believe that someone else is more qualified than you.
You can stand up in front of a room and deliver a presentation while privately wondering whether everyone else knows something you don't.
You can make big, bold decisions—and still be doing them from a place of fear.
Over the last few years, I've spent a great deal of time doing the inner work. I've looked at the beliefs I hold about myself, the stories I've carried with me and the reasons I sometimes looked outside myself for validation.
And that work has changed something.
I'm still capable of feeling nervous. I still have an inner critic. But I'm much less concerned about whether everybody approves of what I'm doing.
And that has made it easier to become visible.
Recently, I made what felt like another big, brave move: I put this podcast out into the world and shared it with people I know.
And that might sound like a very small thing.
But a year ago, I would have worried about who might see it.
What would former colleagues think?
Would people think I was ridiculous?
Would they wonder who I thought I was?
Instead, something rather lovely happened.
People were kind.
People were supportive.
And many of the people whose opinions I had worried about simply said, in one way or another: of course you're doing this.
It reminded me that sometimes the stories we tell ourselves about what other people think are just that.
Stories.
And it also reminded me why I believe the work we do on ourselves matters.
Because confidence isn't always about becoming louder.
It's not about pretending to be somebody else.
For me, confidence has increasingly come from knowing who I am, understanding what I bring to the table and being prepared to let other people see it.
I'M ALSO INTRODUCING THE NEXT CHAPTER PATHWAY
I've been quietly building something behind the scenes called The Next Chapter Pathway.
I've created it for people who want to make positive, intentional changes in their lives—even if they don't yet know exactly what those changes need to look like.
It's built around four connected pillars:
Build Your Foundation — getting clear on what you want, what matters and where you're going.
Build Yourself — strengthening your mindset, confidence, identity, energy and boundaries.
Build Your Business — creating work and income that reflects who you are and supports the life you want.
Build Your Life — creating more freedom, fulfilment, choice and space for what matters.
I've created the Pathway because I don't think these areas of our lives exist in isolation.
You can have a brilliant business idea but struggle to put yourself out there.
You can achieve everything you thought you wanted and still find yourself asking:
Is this actually the life I want?
You can know that something needs to change without knowing exactly where to begin.
The Next Chapter Pathway is designed to give you ideas, tools and space to explore what comes next—and then start building it.
You'll find short, focused lessons, practical exercises and worksheets, journaling prompts, tools and resources, with new content added every week. There's also a private community and two live community conversations with me each month.
If you'd like to find out more, you can explore the Pathway here:
Explore The Next Chapter Pathway
WHY NOW?
I also talk in this episode about my dear friend Kevin.
Kevin was one of those people who genuinely believed that you could decide what you wanted and go after it.
When we were younger, he worked in an office job—but what he really wanted to do was fly.
So he did something about it.
He started with gliding, progressed through flying and eventually built a career training pilots.
He had a photograph above his desk of a tiny kitten looking into a mirror.
And in the mirror, the kitten saw a lion.
I've thought about that photograph a lot over the years.
Kevin died unexpectedly when he was just 63.
And losing someone reminds you of something important.
We don't have forever.
None of us knows how many ordinary Tuesdays we have left.
So perhaps there comes a point when we have to stop waiting for the perfect time.
Stop waiting until we feel completely ready.
Stop assuming that we'll get around to it one day.
And start asking:
What do I want?
What needs to change?
And what is one thing I could begin doing now?
IN THIS EPISODE
I talk about:
- Why changing your circumstances doesn't always change your thinking
- The difference between appearing confident and actually feeling confident
- Why I've become more visible over the last year
- The beliefs and self-doubt that can quietly hold us back
- Why I believe inner work matters
- Why I've created The Next Chapter Pathway
- The four pillars: Build Your Foundation, Build Yourself, Build Your Business and Build Your Life
- Why confidence can grow after you start doing the thing
- Why we shouldn't assume we have forever
A THOUGHT TO TAKE WITH YOU
You can make the big move, start the business, change the job or completely reinvent your life—and still take your old fears with you.
Sometimes changing your life isn't just about changing what's happening around you.
It's about changing what you believe is possible for yourself.
LINKS & RESOURCES MENTIONED
THE NEXT CHAPTER PATHWAY
I've created The Next Chapter Pathway as a practical, flexible space to help you work out what comes next—and start building it.
If you're ready for change but you're not entirely sure what that change needs to look like, you can find out more here:
Explore The Next Chapter Pathway
TO BE MAGNETIC
I've spent several years doing inner work with To Be Magnetic, and I mention some of that work in this episode.
Their work around limiting beliefs, authenticity and the patterns we carry with us has been an important part of my own journey.
→ Join TBM and use code HELEN5607 for 15% off
This is an affiliate/referral link, which means I may receive a commission if you choose to join through my link, at no additional cost to you. I've personally used To Be Magnetic and only share resources that I've genuinely used or believe may be useful.
ABOUT AN ORDINARY TUESDAY
An Ordinary Tuesday is my podcast about real life, change, growth and the messy business of working out what comes next.
In each episode, I explore questions such as:
What do I actually want now?
Who am I becoming?
What needs to change?
How do I become more confident and trust myself?
How do I build a life, career or business that gives me more freedom, meaning and fulfilment?
I'll be talking about confidence, mindset, identity, relationships, work, business, money, personal growth and the sometimes messy business of trying to work out what comes next.
There are no promises of a perfect life.
No pressure to hustle.
And no requirement to have everything figured out.
Just honest conversations, useful ideas and the occasional reminder that your life doesn't have to be completely extraordinary to be worth paying attention to.
Because sometimes an ordinary Tuesday can be the day you decide to do something differently.
ABOUT THE NEXT CHAPTER PATHWAY
I've created The Next Chapter Pathway because I know how easy it is to spend years building a life around other people's needs, expectations and priorities.
At some point, you get to build something with yourself at the centre.
The Pathway brings together four connected areas of life:
Build Your Foundation. Get clear on what you want, what matters and where you're going.
Build Yourself. Strengthen your mindset, confidence, identity, energy and boundaries.
Build Your Business. Create work and income that reflects who you are and supports the life you want.
Build Your Life. Create more freedom, fulfilment, choice and space for what matters.
You don't need to have everything figured out before you begin.
That's what the Pathway is for.
Find out more about The Next Chapter Pathway
CONNECT WITH ME
I'd love to hear what you thought about this episode.
Instagram:
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Website:
Helen Collard
The Next Chapter Pathway:
Explore the Pathway
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